Putting the Healing Pieces Together

Putting the Healing Pieces Together

Past Is Prologue: Learning to Understand Generational Trauma

Growing up as a Jew, I was introduced to the idea of generational trauma long before I ever heard the term or really understood what it meant. From a relatively young age, I was educated about the unimaginable horrors of the Holocaust. I knew our ancestors had been subjected to oppression for millennia, but the Holocaust—that was a cataclysmic event my parents’ and grandparents’ generation had witnessed. This collective trauma—what Jews call the Shoah, the Hebrew word for “catastrophe”—was something we all carried, and we were taught that our vigilance was the price we paid to live out the promise of two simple words: “Never again.”

Growing Together: Friendship Gifts, Griefs, and Grace

Growing Together: Friendship Gifts, Griefs, and Grace

When I was 19, I met a girl through a mutual friend. She was funny, exuded confidence, and said and did whatever she wanted to. She and I were both tentative with each other. We circled cautiously but eventually found ourselves laughing hysterically at the same things. This would be the beginning of an almost 30-year friendship. This friendship would sometimes be tumultuous, yet it is the most loyal relationship I've ever had—the longest outside of my family. Our relationship even surpassed my marriage. However, there have been hurtful moments along the way. Some were petty, some we were not sure we'd recover from, some we had to take breaks from each other, and some brought us closer than we ever thought we could be. For lack of a better description, she is my "ride or die" because of the honesty and painful confrontations our friendship has gone through. 

Invisible Inheritance: Finding Empowerment Through Awareness

Invisible Inheritance: Finding Empowerment Through Awareness

If I asked you, “what have you inherited from your family?” A few different ideas might come to mind: maybe your curly hair, your complexion, your knack for reading people, that stubborn streak, or your sense of humor, and on and on. We also know there’s other stuff you can’t see: maybe diabetes runs in your family, or high blood pressure, or other medical issues. However, there’s something else that can be inherited too: trauma. 

Accepting Yourself

Accepting Yourself

Acceptance is one of those words that can have positive and negative connotations based on its context. When I think about acceptance, I come up against questions that I’ve wrestled with myself and witnessed my clients wrangle in therapy sessions. Is acceptance the same thing as forgiveness?

Self - Kindness was my Key to Self - Compassion

Self - Kindness was my Key to Self - Compassion

“Self-compassion is simply giving the same kindness to ourselves that we would give to others.” – Christopher Germer

Be kind. It is a simple concept and one that many people try to live by. We often try to extend kindness to others and to treat other people with respect, but why is it so hard to be kind to ourselves? I have often been described as a kind person.

Self-Compassion: Builiding the House You Live in

Self-Compassion: Builiding the House You Live in

“A word after a word after a word is power.” Margaret Atwood tells us. “You cannot build joy on a feeling of self-loathing.” teaches Ram Dass. “The words you speak become the house you live in.” writes the poet Hafiz. All three offer the wisdom that how we speak to and about ourselves influences the ways we show up in the world and engage with others. Language helps us to make meaning of our experiences.

Breaking the Cycle. Ending the Pain. Healing Generational Trauma

Breaking the Cycle. Ending the Pain. Healing Generational Trauma

“Remaining silent about family pain is rarely an effective strategy for healing it. The suffering will surface again at a later time, often expressing in the fears or symptoms of a later generation.” - Mark Wolynn 

This quote hurts and cuts deep. Reading it makes me want to spill every single word about my own experiences with generational trauma I hold inside of me, healed and unhealed, on this page. I’m not here to do that. I’m here to share resources that show it is possible to break the cycle of generational trauma. I’m here to show, with personal experience, that it is possible to break the cycle of generational trauma. Briefly, generational trauma is trauma that has been transferred from one generation to another. These traumatic events can shape and impact the way that generations to come understand, cope, and heal. 

Processing PTSD

Processing PTSD

Posttraumatic stress disorder, or PTSD, is a collection of negative behaviors, symptoms, and moods triggered by a traumatic experience. PTSD can also be triggered by an ongoing event. The event can occur over a matter of days, weeks, months, or even years. This is known as complex posttraumatic stress disorder or C-PTSD. Experiences associated with posttraumatic stress disorder are abuse, terrorism, natural disasters, violence, and illness.


Navigating Grief and Loss

Navigating Grief and Loss

Loss is an inevitable part of life that impacts everyone in different ways. Loss can come in various forms, from the passing of a spouse, to the loss of a friendship, even to the termination of employment. As we have pushed through the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic, we come to a terrifying realization of how quickly life, relationships, and/or jobs can be taken out of our grasp.


Healing and Growing Through Life's Journey

Healing and Growing Through Life's Journey

According to Cambridge Dictionary, healing is the process by which a bad situation or painful emotion either ends or improves (Cambridge dictionary: Find definitions, meanings & translations 2022).  Growth, according to the APA Dictionary of Psychology, is a series of physical changes that occur from conception through maturity (APA Dictionary of Psychology 2022).